Monday 24 February 2020

Most Common Things That Might Be Ruining Your Relationship with Your Partner

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Anyone in a relationship can have issues with their partner time to time and yet tries to make it successful. However, several external and internal factors may impact a relationship and both the partners should take responsibility for their attitude and actions. Keeping the same in mind, we have mentioned below some issues and how can they turn even the happiest relationship sour: –

1.      Ignoring to Pay attention To your Own Appearance

A person who neglects to take care of their own appearance is essentially showing a lack of hunger for their self-improvement while emphasizing the fact that they do not want to make an effort to look nice in front of their partner. This can gently create trouble for the foundations of a relationship, specifically, if your partner is particularly motivated look fit and care about the image they present.



2.      Taking your Partner for Granted

Married couples took an oath to love and look after each another, while this may not always work out, but the sentiment is almost universally genuine and heartfelt. It’s easy for even happy and content relationships to develop sour if you start taking your partner for granted and do not appreciate the potentials that you originally fell in love with years’ ago. If you want to maintain a happy and satisfying relationship with your partner, you must continue to show your appreciation and love through the time of your togetherness.

3.      Storing up Negative Emotions

Relationships are not easy always easy, and even true soul mates can face the times of turbulence and conflict. While the love is enough to go a long way to resolve these different types of concerns, however, you mustn't store up these negative emotions in a way that they raise bitterness, jealousy or paranoia. If you continue to have negative feelings even after a relationship breakup, you must talk about it openly and make sure that they are fixed before you move on.



4.      Being Excessively Critical of Your Partner

Every individual has their own unique values in life, and try to find a partner who shares the same values as close as possible. However, this is not always possible to be on the same page, and we must sometimes compromise on some ideas for the sake of our relationship. If you and your partner have some compatibility issues then you must cease yourself from being critical of your partner. The dissimilarities between two persons must be embraced in a successful relationship, rather than criticized.

5.      Not Understanding One Another’s Expectations

A failure to understand your partners’ expectations may also create conflicts. It is not necessary that you can fulfil all the expectations of your partner yet it is crucial to at least understand the needs of your partner and work together to achieve them.



6.      Not Following Your Own Interests

While sharing hobbies offers a couple the chances to make their bond stronger, it is also vital that one has their own interests and hobbies. This allows people to retain their own exclusive identity in their relationship. But if a person ignores to follow their own interests, they can easily become frustrated and demoralized in their everyday life.

7.      Putting Your Requirements First

A true relationship is based on collaborations and a sense of compromise, that one should consider the needs of their partner ahead of their own. Individuals who place their own needs ahead are not likely to thrive in a relationship, as their partner can become tired of their feelings being disregarded over time.

8.      Escaping Honest and Open Communication to Keep the Peace

Honest and open communication can eventually save and preserve a relationship. But also may cause a substantial quantity of conflict and trouble in the course. One should never be afraid of having honest and open communication when it is about resolving relationship issues. read here -




9.      Not Maintaining a perfect balance between Personal and Work-life

We all work, to provide for your family, which is admirable. You may expect your partner to be accepting your need to work odd hours or on weekends, however, it may be frustrating for them if your schedule is impacting your relationship negatively. You must then also try your best to create a possible work-life balance, to enable you to give more time to your partner.

10.  Not Apologizing When Required

Not even the most loving relationship will survive without mutual respect. Your willingness to apologize and show regret when you are wrong is a way to show respect to your partner. It shows a sense of maturity and integrity when you happily accept your mistakes or offend your partner.

All these are the most common reasons people neglect and it can create conflicts between them. However, if you stuck in a situation where conflicts are creating bitterness and your relationship with your partner seems to be in danger, seek marriage counselling, couple counselling or online counselling help to get the best conflict resolution therapist help.

Tuesday 11 February 2020

How Unmet Needs are Impacting Your Relationship.

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Needs act as the bedrock in deciding where we place ourselves, what and who we choose for ourselves and how we maintain an equilibrium.

Just like Maslow explained the hierarchy of needs to grow and evolve as individuals, these are applicable in terms of our relationships too.

Physiological Needs- financial stress like insurmountable debts or dissatisfied sex life cripples a romantic relationship. A partner would run out of any resources to meet the emotional needs of themselves or their partners.

Safety Needs - Past experience of abuse will constantly send you signals that the world is not a safe place to be. Or, if you have struggled as a child for the basic warmth, love, affection, and attention, you may exhibit and reflect the same pattern in your future relationships by becoming too needy or too distant.





Conversely, you may not feel safe with your partner to express your vulnerabilities. This could be due to your partner avoiding conflict, shutting off themselves or making you feel unattended with your feelings. Thus making your relationship inauthentic and stressful.


Love and belongingness- It is about placing your relationship in public or within your community. If a partner fails to feel supported or acknowledged within the community (read- inlaws/extended family) there could arise conflicts in the relationship.


Esteem- When one partner has low self image, they may end up with insecurities - real or imagined. This could bring jealousy or unhealthy conflict-management in the relationship.


Self Actualization- When partners accept each other how they are and are ready to do self-work it unleashes the potential for the healthiest form of relationships. There are fewer taunts and more empathy.

Wednesday 18 December 2019

Benefits of Online Counselling

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Online counselling or therapy, once known as an alternative therapy, has now become a normal practice ideal for both the clients as well as the therapists. It is appreciated for bridging the gap that traditional face to face therapy process has and given solution to multiple issues of face to face traditional therapy procedure such as convenience, accessibility, affordability and others.

Convenience

Online therapy is more convenient than traditional. This kind of therapy lessens the burden of setting up and fixing appointments that are common in traditional settings. It also helps the therapist to offer their services to more and more clients as appointments can be scheduled easily over 24 hours and increase the reach to a larger geographical region.



Online therapy is a more preferred choice for those individuals who feel uncomfortable in face to face session with an unknown person speaking about their problems and sufferings because of the social phobias, anxiety disorders, or agoraphobias.

Accessibility

Web or Online counselling is accessible easily for those who want to avail it. Online therapy overpowers the obstructions that may prevent someone from seeking help from a therapist.

For instance, people who reside in rural or remote areas or are physically disabled or those who cannot leave their home because of the children can easily access the online therapy services conveniently. For people who reside in such areas where there is no mental health clinics can get the benefit of online counselling.



Online counselling is also effective for encouraging children and teenagers for therapy sessions as they seem more comfortable using the internet for counselling. Anyone with access to the internet can use online therapy services conveniently. Sometimes if the therapist is not available they can also send an email with the perception like they are interacting with their therapist when writing the email.

Affordability

Web or Online counselling has been proved to be more economical for both the client and the therapist. Particularly for the therapists who cannot afford or are not willing to rent any commercial space to lower the overhead costs for capital, commuting property and administration processes when comparing with traditional counselling services.


Wednesday 11 December 2019

Tips to Improve Living If You have Depression

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Everyday life seems more challenging to a person dealing with depression. Be it socializing, meeting friends, going to work, or even just getting out of your bed may feel like a big struggle.

Here are a few things that you can do to deal with these symptoms of depression and improve your lifestyle.

1.      Have a Support Network

The most essential things you can do to help yourself with depression, except medication and therapy, is to have strong social support for yourself.

For a few, this may be like building stronger bonds with family or friends. Understanding that you can count on caring for loved ones will also help to go a long way towards improving your condition.



For others, their depression support circle can be the key. It can be a social group in your area or an online therapist who meets your needs and understands your concerns.

2.      Reduce Your Stress

When you stress about things, your body creates more of a hormone known as cortisol. For a short time, it can be a good thing as it helps you to deal with whatever is causing you the stress in life.



But in the long run, however, it can cause several harms for you, as well as depression. So reducing stress will reduce your risk of becoming depressed.

3.      Improve Your Sleep Hygiene

Mood and sleep are closely related. As per studies people with major depressive disorder experience sleep disturbances.

Sometimes, you may feel you just can't fall asleep easily. Or possibly you may struggle to get out of bed in the morning as you feel exhausted most of the time.



Maintaining sleep hygiene is the key to improve the quality of your sleep.

Turn off your devices TV or mobiles at least an hour before you go to sleep. Dim light and try to read a book or use any other relaxing activity.

If you do work in bed, or even in your bedroom, it can cause you to connect your bed with stress, rather than comfort.

4.      Improve Your Eating Habits

There is a direct link between your diet and mental health. As per studies improving nutrition can save you and even treat your mental illness.




A lot of brain-essential nutrients can cure depression. For example, a study found that zinc deficiency can increase symptoms of depression. So improving your diet helps you to reduce your symptoms.

5.      Stop Negative Thoughts

Depression just not makes you feel low but also causes negative thinking. Changing negative thoughts, however, can help improve your mood.




6.      Beat Procrastination

The signs of depression, like fatigue and trouble, concentrating, make procrastination tempting.

Putting things off oils depression and can lead to feeling guilt, stress, and worried.



It is essential to fix goals and manage your time. Make short-term goals and effort hard to complete the priorities done first. Every job you complete successfully will help you break through the pattern of procrastination.

7.      Get a The grip on Your Everyday Responsibilities

Depression can make you find it challenging to complete household responsibilities, like doing the dishes or paying your bills.




But a load of paperwork or stack of un-cleaned dishes, and floors hid in dust or dirty clothes will only amplify your feelings of worthlessness.

So without making any delay, take control of your daily tasks. Start with small work first and one at a time. Getting up and moving will help you feel better in itself.

8.      Make Your Wellness Toolbox

A wellness toolbox can help you calm yourself when you feel down.

Think of things that make you happy. And when you feel down, try one of these activities.




Cuddling your pet, taking a warm bath, listening to favorite music, gardening, or reading a good book can be your tools to help feel good.

Create your own list of your favorite activities and try when you feel bad. 

If you are not able to help yourself and depression is making you feel suicidal thoughts, then its time to seek depression counseling professional help, talk to a therapist nearby, or on online counseling as soon as possible. 

Saturday 30 November 2019

How to Help Yourself after a Breakup

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It is not easy to move on from the pain, after a painful break-up with your ex. But after a heart-break, it is normal to feel gloomy. There is no vulnerable or weaker time in someone’s life than that after a breakup. Remaining strong post a breakup can seem to be impossible.
No matter what the situations, it is hard for everyone. 



Although in some cases it can be significantly harder than others, for instance for those being cheated on or left for the other woman. In fact who broke up with whom or it was mutual, does not always matter, it is painful and far too easy to get drawn back into a position that you know is not good for you. 

That is the reason why relationship breakups hardly stick at first attempt. Usually, partners hurt each other a few times before it finally happens. It is a torture, and the sad part is that we do it to ourselves.

Here are the tips about how someone can stay strong after a breakup and move on to better things.

Let Yourself Cry

You have to release painful emotions out or they will stay to haunt you and eat you alive. Denying your feelings can make things worse. So let cry, feel sad, let yourself be angry and grieve with pain. Allow yourself until you feel sorry for yourself and be sure to pick yourself up and make a resolution to move on.

Write It Out.

Writing is extremely therapeutic. No matter how close you were there is always something left out to say. Doesn’t matter how many times you said it out you will never feel satisfied this is where writing will work.

Get Support from Closed Ones

Seek out emotional support from your family and friends. Don’t do it alone, it makes everything ten times worse. When your significant one is not there in your life, you may feel a big deep hole in your heart. And the way to fill it is to get love and support from the people in your life.


Follow the No Contact Rule

It is would be impossible for you to stay strong if you still are in contact with your ex after a breakup. Stop. If you wish to move on, you must cut off contact. If it seems too much to bear, then just do not think of it as forever. But stay away from contact. Your focus should be on moving on and staying strong.

Forgive and Move On

For you it may not be possible to forgive them, but who cares? Move on as this is not about him, it’s more about you. Holding on anger and bitterness is slow poison and you will hurt yourself only. So let it go. Forgive and Forget to move on.

Tuesday 26 November 2019

How To Understand If you Are Sad or Depressed

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It is very normal sometimes to feel a bit down, anxious or stressed, as daily issues related to career and society can fuel temporary bursts of sorrows and make you feel a bit “off.” While it is natural not to feel best every day if you are obsessed by a relentless sense of anguish that stops you to enjoy the things you love the most, then it is the time to look closely at your feelings.

Although the very common sign of depression is a deep sense of despair, still depression many times also influences people in other ways. Not every depressed person experiences have the same symptoms and the intensity can be different depending on the circumstances of an individual or person.



On the other hand, Feeling sad is a normal human response to difficult times and sooner or later goes away. This sense can be assumed a little part of the depression, and few people with depression also may not be sad at all. 

If you find it difficult to determine whether you are depressed or only sad for some reasons, here are some points to think through. As per the therapists, if you are having any of these symptoms for approximately half a month, then chances are that you have depression.

Lack of Concentration

If you find it difficult to meet with commitments, deadlines, or routine errands appear to slip-up and seem fuzzy, it can also be a sign of depression. 



Trouble concentrating, memorizing or decisions making is an outcome of your mind being preoccupied with feelings of sadness that leads to blurred thinking and perhaps certain strange and out-of-character resolutions.

Increased or decreased Appetite

As depression makes you reserved and checked out, it can result in loss of appetite. Forgetting your meals or losing interest in preparing or cooking for yourself, is the common symptoms. 



The opposite can also occur, you may experience improved hunger driven to overeating, as the body may use food binges as a basis of comfort.

Irresistible Sense of Fear

Another symptom is panic thoughts or feeling anxious. More than the worrying about new circumstances, anxiety is an endless sense of obsessive and panicked thoughts that may cause physical symptoms as well, like an unstable heartbeat, sweating and sleep problems.



Losing Interest Hobbies and Activities

Possibly you have always planned for a Monday-night dance class or scrapbooking many loving memories, but when the day comes you don’t find that motivation or longing to do it. If this results in avoiding lots of outings and experiences, then it is something serious. 



Depression can make you unconcerned about your interests and hobbies that once provided you joy, therefore stopping these activities that could improve your mood. Depression Counselling helps you to understand how to avoid such negative thought and come back to normal life again.

These are only a few possible symptoms of depression, at any stage your routine life and normal activity gets disturbed by these major symptoms, which means assessing further. Depression is not a significant weakness or a character flaw and is not something you can simply shake. 

If you be certain that you are experiencing any symptoms of depression, it is essential to seek out professional help. A therapist or psychologist can help you by talking to you on your issues and by teaching you to how to acknowledge your emotions and cope up with the negative thoughts.

Monday 25 November 2019

6 Ingredients for a Successful Relationship

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Relationships can be assumed as a difficult recipe. A recipe needs certain ingredients essential to create a delicious and excellent dish. While baking or cooking, it is necessary to follow the directions and take the measurements, set forth by the recipes.

If you use the wrong ingredients, or miss any ingredients, or use inappropriate amount, then you are risking messing up the dish. Your recipes will either taste a bit off or totally destroyed, rendering it uneatable. Relationships work same as recipes; they need a lot of ingredients to work and in the appropriate quantity are important.



The incorrect ingredients or wrong mixture of these ingredients can make a relationship unhealthy, unstable, or even abusive that leads to a painful break-up. So people need to be careful about what they put into their relationship to make them healthy and long-lasting partnerships.

Here are some ingredients that are necessary if you want to have a successful relationship:

Communication-  Healthy communication is one of the most important ingredients or component to have a healthy relationship with your partner. Lack of communication or miscommunication may lead to relationship failure.

Communication lets couples to stay on the same page and resolve any conflict in effective and productive ways. Listening to each other’s concern is important to value and hear individual feelings. If you feel you are not able to communicate your concerns to your partner then you can also consider relationship counselling experts to know the effective ways for putting your concerns to your partner.



Trust- Trust is the foundation of any relationship. Honesty, Transparency and clarity are vital to build and maintain trust in a relationship. Trust is built on dependability and reliability and does not come easily, particularly for a person who has been deceived earlier. Trust is fragile and broken once can be very hard to get back together. It is about being there protecting one another’s hearts and keeping promises.  

Intimacy- Physical and emotional intimacies are also important for a healthy relationship. Emotional intimacy helps a couple stay connected and sync with each other. It helps in developing a sense of safety and security with each other. Physical intimacies like holding hands, cuddling, and physical relations should be the top priority to preserve the romance in a relationship.

Working Together and Sharing the Responsibilities – The key to a healthy and successful relationship is to work together share responsibilities of household and parenting. Working together allows couples to create a stronger connection and to get over obstacles and difficult situations together.



Respect- Having respect for each other is significant to develop a healthy relationship. Partners are required to respect each other’s opinions, thoughts, aspirations and dreams. Individuals in a relationship have to respect each other’s concern despite being disagreed with them.

Friendship- Enjoying your partner’s company, laughing with them, and having fun together as true friends help you to build a strong bond with your partner. Building romance and love upon a strong friendship make a relationship, long-lasting.  

Recipes can be complex and challenging sometimes. Even most skilled chefs and bakers use their creativity and instincts to prepare a dish. Relationships are so much like that. Relationships are messy, tricky and complicated. To make them happening these necessary ingredients needed to be present in the right amounts. Creativity and instincts also are an important part to have a healthy relationship as every relationship is different not the same. 

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